TMI- How Much Is Too Much And Too Soon?

When you meet a new friend or work colleague or even a potential romantic partner we all consciously or unconsciously decide what to reveal about ourselves early on. Sometimes we are so overwhelmed with a new friend to bring in to our circle and excited that we may go overboard in trusting someone with some of our innermost thoughts sooner than we should. I used to trust first and ask questions later but as I have grown older it has flipflopped and unless there is a super special connection being guarded but optimistically open has been my approach. No one ever wants to come away from a gathering or party and be the person that told way more than they should have after one too many glasses of cheer.

[Photo Credit: Wix Images]

So that then begs the question.....what to reveal and how soon??? I have definitely asked myself that same question at times but typically the circumstances have dictated what seems natural to divulge. Nothing feels better than pouring your heart out to a new found friend over a glass of wine at a girls night out or ladies game night. However, sometimes holding back isn’t a bad thing. I like to trust first but be emotionally cautious as I mentioned. Now if it is a work colleague I have tried to enforce strict boundaries in the office or even out of the office in terms of getting too “familiar” but I know many that blur the lines with no problem. There was a time when I would be on social media with work colleagues and generally there has never been an issue but as different social media platforms have evolved a more conservative approach has taken over as the norm. In personal relationships it isn’t necessarily any easier. Unless you live under a rock, you are going to be in a conversation at some time with someone wondering if you should “go there” if you feel very comfortable with them.

So the answer it seems is “It Depends”. It depends on the timing, atmosphere, your comfort level and what might be TMI for one person may not be for another. I guess like any other situation you have to “read the room ” or at least your audience. In the end, your inner voice will lead you to the right decision. You may not always get it right and may have regrets the next day but if you chose your confidant wisely it probably shouldn’t matter how soon you reveal the side of you that many may not see. However, if they do have a problem with it then chalk it up to a momentary lapse in judgement and realize you may have saved your self a lot of time in finding out who they really are by simply doing nothing more than “cutting to the chase”.

XO & #StayCurious