The Dream Job That Never Happened

I have been very lucky to have had a very successful professional career that has given me many opportunities to meet all kinds of people, travel to places I may never have been able to go and achieve financial success that allowed me to give my kids more advantages than I had growing up in a lower middle income family. We always had what we needed but from 15 on I paid for all of my clothes, gas and anything beyond the basics. Having to work all through high school and college taught me many things that I am grateful for and have taken many of those lessons with me through life.

[Photo Credit: Wix Stock photos]

Over the years before graduating and getting a professional job that launched my career I was a fast food worker, waitress, party cleanup detail girl for a temp agency, hostess, bank employee, retail salesperson, drugstore clerk, shelf stocker, customer service agent and probably a few more I am forgetting. One summer I worked 3 jobs to keep money in the bank, pay expenses and keep gas in a car I was grudgingly allowed to use held together by rust but very grateful I had wheels that got me from point a to point b.

I have always sought better opportunities that moved my career forward and have been so lucky to be able to have gotten job offers most of the time when I interviewed for a position I really wanted. I am one of those weird people that may get a few butterflies when interviewing but actually enjoy the process of meeting people and have always looked upon interviews as a two way street. I am there evaluating them just as they are evaluating me. However, one of the exceptions to that success happened to be a ”dream” position that never happened.

I landed a great job right out of college but as it turned out it was not my life’s work. A Fortune 500 company with a clear path for advancement but my desires were in another field. I had secretly desired to live in NYC and work in the Garment District. I loved luxury brands and the big city. At a very unexpected time in a very unexpected way I had the chance to interview for a position with a then very successful ladies clothing brand.

I was whisked up to NYC for the day for a round of interviews and had daydreamed for weeks about how I could commute from the southern city I was living in or talk my then husband in to making the move to the Big Apple. I was interviewing for the prestigious position of Assistant Product Manager. It was my dream job just waiting there for me to grab it and change the direction of my career and life. When I arrived at the office in NYC I was surprised by the demeanor and curt responses of the first people I encountered. I am from the northeast so I was not naive to the fact that many New Yorkers can be friendly nice people but not necessarily warm and fuzzy. At that time I was still a novice in the business world so I didn’t have my confident diva mojo going just yet. When I sat down for my first interview what I noticed was I was totally dressed improperly for the occasion. I was in professional clothing from head to toe but it was overkill. I quickly realized I brought too much of my corporate buttoned up look to a place that was looking for originality and flair with style that oozed a trendy personal brand.

I could tell as the senior manager looked me up and down I was not what she expected. My resume and references were impeccable and I had gotten the interview from a strong recommendation from a friend in the industry I knew from my retail days. I moved on to the next interview which was a gentleman that could have cared less that I had stepped into his office except for the fact he seemed annoyed I had interrupted a conference call he was about to get on. The vibe was not good. I was feeling the beginning of the “brush off” and quick polite questions he already knew answers to from my resume. After a total of about 15 minutes I was prompted to find a place to grab a bite just outside their offices down the street. It was just at that minute I felt sick to my stomach and knew I had blown it.

This was not happening and when I arrived back after eating I was informed that something had come up for my later interviews and they would reschedule but a car was on its way to shuttle me back to the airport. My head was spinning and could not decide whether to be devastated or mad as hell. I was actually both. I most definitely had the flare and style they were after and in fact one of the women in the office had a very similar hand bag I was going to use and an outfit style I had considered but I played it safe instead of going with my instincts.

And there you have it. I did not listen to my little voice and go there presenting my authentic self with a make it or break it attitude. I went there too measured and came off as stuffy and rigid instead of who I really am.

For me it reminded me of when you take a multiple choice test and you choose your first answer ( which was the right one) and then you think way too hard about it, change it and then got it wrong. It was exactly what happened with my choice in attire for the interview. I didn’t go with my instincts for my outfit choice that day that would have allowed me to feel comfortable in my own skin and I failed to present my personal brand that I know would have landed me the job. I never had another shot at a job like that but instead found my way to a very fulfilling career in pharmaceuticals selling lifesaving drugs instead. I guess you would say I made lemonade out of lemons but really looking back the path I ended up on was the right path for me even though I didn’t know it at first. As much as I love visiting NYC I don’t think I would have ever loved living there on a full time basis.

I learned a lot from that failure. Be yourself and let the chips fall where they may. Don’t go to any interview trying to be something you are not or present an image you THINK they want to see because in reality you may not know what that really is. Your best bet is to follow your instincts and if you are not a good fit even though you presented the best version of your personal brand at the interview then move on. It wasn’t or isn’t meant to be and you will find another “home” where you truly belong. I do believe that as much as I wanted my career to go in that direction at that time, the universe had other plans and it may be a cliche’ but I believe for the most part ( with a few exceptions) that everything happens for a reason.

XO & #StayCurious